The Nation's Health

Something stupid

"24 year old male, just wants to do something stupid"

Call takers can only write down what they are told, and that often leads to us reading some bizarre things on our screen. As soon as 999 is dialled, a computer automatically dispatches the nearest ambulance to either a) the address linked to the landline or b) the mobile phone coordinates from where the mobile is calling from. Yes, this is what the job was given as and it was the only information we had to go on! What do you say to that? How do you prepare? Is he suicidal? Is he just stupid? What stupid thing could he want to do? It sounds as if he is unsure and is open to suggestions. With so many possibilities we thought it would be prudent to compile a list of options / suggestions / guesses as to what he might have done / be about to do / is considering! There was a good chance that once the call had

1) Jump off a bridge

2) Get married

3) Jump off a telephone box

4) Open an unknown link on Twitter

5) Play with traffic

6) Eat yellow snow

7) Play chicken with a train

8) Scuba dive in a shallow fountain

9) Get a scooter and put a big card board box around it. On the side write Time machine.

10) Eat glass

11) Stick head in a crocodiles mouth

12) Get incarcerated in Shawshank prison

13) Go to Libya

14) Say 'bomb' on a plane

15) Buy a BlackBerry

16) Join the ambulance service

17) Provoke a man with a gun

18) Declare a 'jihad' on a super-power

19) Listen to Justin Bieber

20) Call an ambulance for 'wanting to do something stupid'

Needless to say, we were cancelled but it was fun to guess! I wonder what he did?!