The Nation's Health

Mike Dangerfield

I'd like to cast your minds back to almost a year ago, back to the day of The Jubilee! That glorious summers day where as a country we united to either a) rejoice in Liz making it to 60 years without becoming a power hungry dictator or b) relished the excuse to have a street party or BBQ in the name of patriotism. Being a day to remember, a bank holiday for all and a time for friends and families to be together, it was obvious that I was working a 12 hour shift. Not only that, but I was a 'relief' which meant that until I arrived I wouldn't know who I'd be working with. It could be absolutely anyone. Someone I like, someone I dislike, a stranger, a bore, a keen student or a manager! Anyway, having seen Liz on a boat and hearing that Phil had a UTI I had to rush off.

Today was a day where I could breathe a sigh of relief. It was someone I liked. 12 hours would be a little more bearable. Not much, but a little. It's worth mentioning, most people on our ambulance station were at a staff members Jubilee BBQ that instantly made me want to sulk. We got our stuff on the vehicle, checked it had everything and booked on. Then my crew mate turned to me....

"Right, no doubt I'll be featuring in your blog in some way, shape or form. Well, I want a cool name for you to refer to me by."

"Haha, do you have anything in mind?"

"Mike Dangerfield! It's kind of action man like but with some added danger"

"You've thought about this far too much!"

So, as the clock struck 3pm Mr Dangerfield and myself headed off into the unknown. By unknown, I mean the busy city streets, city streets literally brimming with people who had drunk too much 'punch'. House parties and street parties cause 'punch' to be made. 'Punch' is loosely translated to 'every spirit we can find mixed with orange juice and fruit'. Unsurprisingly, it causes most people who drink it to walk like a new born giraffe!

The first couple of hours flew by. Mike Dangerfield was on good form, eternally looking for a road sign with his name on it. Alas, it was not found! Every street we passed seemed to fill our cab with the aroma of a different kind of BBQ. Now THAT is a reason to celebrate multiculturalism right there! Oh how I love GREAT BRITAIN! (UKIP, BNP, EDL, take notes) Despite the great sense of community that we were repeatedly passing, we were not involved. We were isolated from it all, in a bright yellow sweat box, tending to the intoxicated and overwhelmed. Then, from nowhere, a golden egg fell on our laps!

"38 year female, ? Fainted, at a street party"

"It's party time! P.A.R.T why?! Because we gotta!" Mike said proudly.

Oh dear......! Luckily I'd seen The Mask so the joke wasn't lost on me! We may be working, but the idea of being at a street party was pretty exciting! Rule Britannia blasting out of the stereo, we set off. Actually, it was Rule Britannia with a backing track of sirens! Honestly, better than it may sound! After a short drive we were there. Bunting lined the road, flags were raised, music was playing, neighbours who'd probably never spoken were gathered together. People of different ages, sexes, ethnicity's, religions and probably sexual orientation were gathered as one proud community! (UKIP, BNP, EDL, take notes) We stopped at the end of the road. Like an action hero crossed with the Duracell bunny, Mike jumped out of the vehicle (I've been told to make him sound enthusiastic).

Our patient was in good spirits, sitting on a chair in the shade, annoyed that she'd caused a commotion! She instantly said that she didn't want to go to hospital! I don't blame her! She'd basically come over faint and dropped to the floor. We checked her over and found nothing untoward so were happy for her to stay and party!

"Help yourself to some food!"

"No, it's OK!"

"Don't be silly, help yourselves! Sit down and relax for a little bit!"

With that, Mike picked up a leg of Jerk Chicken and sat on one of the many loungers!

"Never look a gift horse in the mouth!!"

We ate some food, actually, a lot of food, whilst doing our paperwork. Sandwiches, BBQ, crisps, cakes and cuisine from Jamaica to Sri Lanka! It was amazing! I remember sitting back and thinking that this would be one of the moments I'll look back on in years to come with fondness! I also thought that control would have kittens if we didn't stop eating and make ourselves available! It's not often in this job that a golden egg falls on your lap, or so to speak, but at least we'd made the most of it!

Full up and content Mike and myself headed off. The rest of the shift was uneventful but enjoyable. There were lots of laughs despite never finding Mike Dangerfield Avenue!

I suppose the point of this post, is that despite the troubles this job throws at you sometimes, it is far from all bad. I get to work with some really great people, meet some amazing characters and there aren't many jobs where you can go to work and laugh all day! No doubt my next post will involve me being on the edge of reason but for now I will enjoy reminiscing! It was also a good opportunity to introduce you all to Mike Dangerfield: A heroic man of mystery. No doubt he will be returning in the future!