The Nation's Health

A Popcorn moment

"22 year old male, waving gun around, MPS request you meet at RVP"

The area of London I am based in is relatively quiet. Obviously, due to operational demand I'm nowhere near my base for a large percentage of the shifts but today I was. There were three of us on the vehicle today and we were sat, minding our business tucking into a now cold McDonalds breakfast. I almost choked on my hash brown when this job popped up on the MDT, the location was a very nice road and we don't get gun crime round here! We shot round to the RVP and waited for the police. We were joined by one of our DSO's who handed us ballistic vests. Why we needed ballistic vests I don't know. There was more chance of me ending religious feuding than there was me being anywhere near a gun toting mad man. Besides, as is the case with firearms incidents we are there as a 'just in case' rather than to treat. Despite my sarcastic comments, vocal protest and petulant stamping of feet I was shoe-horned into the vest. It was of no surprise the DSO didn't have one on! He would be 'managing' from a far. I sense 'operation human shield' being to into effect. Bloody cheek!

Eventually the cops arrived and they did so in force! Wow! 4 x SO19 (firearms) vehicle, 4 x police cars, 1 x police van, 1 x dog unit and an incident officer of some sort. The tax payers money was hard at work! After a quick briefing where we were basically told to stay in the ambulance unless told otherwise, we headed round to the address. By that, I mean the convoy of 13 vehicles drove the 1/2 mile, on blue lights, reminiscent of a scene from the Blues Brothers! Obviously in my head the A-Team music was playing and I was revelling in the drama of the entire situation. My crew mate thought I was sad act and the student looked terrified but I didn't care. This was all about me and the fun I was having! We weren't going fast but when we pulled up to the road but there were squeals of breaks from most of the vehicles. Lets not kid ourselves, everyone loves it! They all piled out. The armed police head up the path, leading to front door of the building. Everyone else hung back, clearly thinking what we were. 'I ain't getting shot!'

We sat back, slurping on our flat coke like we were watching S.W.A.T at the cinema and watched the the pile into the building. Unfortunately there were no smoke screens, flash grenades, laser sights, zip lines or anything like that. In fact there was nothing. No door kicked in, no screaming and certainly no gun shots! Dullard! About 10 minutes later, out they came. In handcuffs, was a pathetic looking, tubby Indian guy who looked hungover and bemused. He was wearing jog bottoms and flip flops. Not exactly the Cuban crime lord I was hoping for. He was initially put into the police van, and then at the request of the Incident Commander he was brought to our ambulance to be strip searched. We were basically told to Foxtrot Oscar while this happened so stood in the cold with the DSO. I couldn't resist a swipe about removing my ballistic vest! I was desperate to find out the coup but no one seemed free to be interrogated. Eventually I collared one of them!

"So?! What happened?!"

"Nothing! He was sat on the edge of his bed, smoking a fag, holding a 'Gun Lighter'.

"Awkward!"